My Neighbors saw me run out the door without my pants today.
I didn't mind. I just kept running down the street without a care in the world. From there I ran through Dundee. From Dundee, through Memorial and Elmwood parks; and then along Farnam Street before streaking through Midtown crossing. It was a blissful running all the way through downtown Omaha. All without my pants.
Good pantless. Bad Pantless.
Let's be frank. There is good and bad pantless running. Case in point is the guy on your right. Freak. Not only is he pantless, but also shoeless. I am not condoning this. Definitely bad pantless.
Better pantless: today's temperature of 41° F and light rain wasn't ideal weather to run outside without pants. Certainly after a long winter, it took a little to get reacquainted to the cool winds and puddles splashing against the legs. But it could have been worse. For example, it was 4°F the morning after I declared coats to be yesterday's burden last week. On that chilly morning, I didn't wear a coat to the bus stop, but you can bet your sweet bippy that I wore pants. Today's +40° F was balmy by comparison.
So with that, it's final. Pants are now yesterday's burden too. At least while running. Chances are that the next time you see some dude sprinting through Dundee sans pants, it could be me. If you do, give a honk.
In return, I may flash you a cheeky smile.
Goldilocks and the 3 Bears
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Let's pick up the story in roughly the middle of the action.
... Goldilocks first sampled Papa Bear's porridge, "Holy shit, that's hot,"
she cried, toss...
2 years ago
I don't need pants or shoes, but my hands get cold enough to put boxing gloves on.
ReplyDeletepoor Omahanianinians.... See, Brady pantless is like a Nair commercial. I invented & own pantlessnessissity. My wookie stix were recently featured on Twitter!
ReplyDeleteI endorse the idea
Fred: I don't think it's about warmth. Those boxing gloves are likely packed with Vaseline to achieve soft hands -- so he can enjoy gliding his supple hands through that voluminous hairdo
ReplyDeleteMurphini: your wookie sticks are something to behold. Stay away from the velcro