Thursday, October 20, 2011

A Word From Our Sponsors

Around 10 AM Thursday, I took a coffee break to see what was going on in the world. My escape is When I got there, I immediately saw the BREAKING NEWS headline in the humongous letters. Apparently, word was out that Moammar had been hunted down and killed. I quickly clicked the link, but before I could actually read the BREAKING NEWS, I had to sit through a product endorsement for yogurt.

I like yogurt. And I don't have complaints about the commercial content: smiley, happy people enjoying a delicious snack that was conveniently fortified with calcium for strong bones and teeth. And the kicker was that a portion of the proceeds goes towards the Susan G Komen breast cancer foundation.

Now I'm all for smiley faces, strong bones and teeth. And healthy breasts are about as wholesome steel-cut goodnessey as you can get. But these were the furthest thing from my mind when I was trying to find the low down on ol' Moammar, who was apparently not only way dead, but was also quite gruesomely so. After the 30 second spot, the commercial transitioned to the following:

So like you did and are about to do again, I clicked on the following (be forewarned) link.

Nothing like a side of bloody Gadhafi's face with my wholesome raspberry yogurt. Mmmmm, yogurt. Mmmmm, Moammar.

I understand that somebody's got to pay the bills. I really get that. But yogurt? Now?

Look, if you're gonna be all gristly and such, then why not pitch rifle ammunition, or bludgeoning devices like Louisville Sluggers? Those make far better product-placements than flashing my retina with pro-biotic yogurt a moment before trotting out the bloody boogie man.

Thanks CNN, now I have to find a substitute smoothie mix-in. Bloody Moammar face yogurt isn't going to cut it anymore.