Monday, July 7, 2008

The Voodoo Stratacaster of Bicycles

I met Fredcube for a lunch ride with the UP Peloton on Monday. But perhaps due to the higher temperatures, the group ride was only us. Oh well, we rode on.

During the ride, Fred tells me that his golf game has gotten more interesting since he picked up a left handed golf club and started bombing whitey a la Happy Gilmore from the left side. He's naturally a right handed golfer, but Fred claims he's got more power from the left side.

So it got me thinking. Perhaps Fred needs to change it up on his bike as well. Do like Jimmy Hendrix did to his Vodoo Stratacaster and thread the drive train backwards. He could even follow Sheldon Brown's lead and model his rig after the Gunnar Street Dog Left Drive bike.

I could see Fredcube actually doing this. He and his wookie-sticks on this left-drive thinger. It could be the catalyst of a revolution that might surpass the public's current fixed-gear infatuation.

I'd be willing to bet at least my friend Munson would jump on board. He's got this deal that one of his legs is freaky-stronger than the other. And if we could suspend the laws of physics for a moment to suggest that a left-drive would offer an advantage for the lefty, Munson would be unstoppable. If his left is stronger, forget about it. If his left is weaker, then it'd be an excellent cross trainer to strengthen it. Either way, it'd be win-win.

You could also forget the Eddy Merckx race category. The two of them could race in a special classification for left-drive bikes in a scene reminiscent of the Princess Bride

It's the final lap of the Papillion Twilight Crit and Munson's all smiles.
Fred: What are you smiling about?
~ Munson is in fact all smiles ~
Munson: I'm not a lefty after all!
~ Mashing hard from the right side, he gains a wheel on Fred ~
Fred: You're amazing!
~ Lots of grunting, panting and thinking of lollipops & bunnies ensues from Munson ~
Fred: Hey Mike - there's something I ought to tell you.
Munson: Tell me.
Fred: I'm not a lefty either!
And with that Fredcube sling-shots around him for the victory...

I'm looking forward to seeing that Voodoo Cannondale on the next UP Lunch ride!

5 comments:

  1. I like to think of my Cannondale as a Roadbike of unusual size.

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  2. I like to think of my Bianchi as a steel-clad assassin, or perhaps a ninja.

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  3. I'm mixed up on this post.

    On the one hand, I dig the The Princess Bride meets Sheldon Brown aspect,

    but....

    how can this same person neglect to give proper credit to wherest he doth learneth the term Wookie Stix....?

    Finally I like to think I'm ahead of the curve of my brother. I actually GOT AN EMAIL REPLY from Sheldon Brown (RIP) with a question I had when I built up my electo-forged 1976 Schwinn Varsity into a Fixed Gear Conversion.

    THis bike will withstand a nuclear blast.

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  4. With the heat and humidity lately, it's almost like seeing that R.O.U.S in a fire swamp.

    The Bianchi does look sharp, Bryan. But I tend to think of it more as a medieval war horse dressed for battle.

    And the electro-forged 1976 Schwinn Varsity: there's no doubt not even Dr. Strangelove could take that beauty out.

    Finally, sorry that I didn't reveal the source of the Wookie Stix reference. As it was, I was barely holding the blog together without one more obscure reference (no offense). *Ahem* LET ALL KNOW THAT I, STEEL-CUT, FIRST HEARD THE TERM WOOKIE STIX AT MURPHINI'S HOUSEHOLD. There. That aught to do it. (though I'm quite certain that he stole it without credit from one of his cycling buddies).

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  5. For the archive. Now you can have it both ways.

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