Thursday, June 26, 2008

Grim Reaper Saw Me Riding Home from Work Today

While cruising Old Yeller down that big hill on Farnam just before Saddlecreek, this car suddenly makes an aggressive U-Turn about 20 yards in front of me and proceeds to cut across my lane. The driver didn't see me.

I yell, "AHHHHHHHHHHHH!" like really loud because I didn't have time to think of anything more witty to scream.

That's when I saw the Grim Reaper. He was standing at the entrance to Don And Millie's parking lot, which was where the car was about to run me over.

I'm still yelling, "AHHHHHHHHHHHH" as I quickly turn and bunny hop the half-curb driveway entrance at about 30 mph. Brakes were not even an option.

The car screeches to a stop only inches from me. I could feel the heat of the radiator on my legs and as I whizzed by the Grim Reaper. I think that I heard him snap his fingers and say, "shucks."

Other than the embellishments about the radiator heat and the Grim Reaper stuff, it was all frighteningly true: I was almost a goner!

When I came to a stop, I verified that the car hooked around a concrete median and crossed a solid double yellow line. It was bad enough that I had nearly been in a serious accident, but the thought of my life ending over such stupidity, and for what -- a Millie burger and a cheese frenchie? Getting mad. Madder....


With adrenaline surging through my veins, I turned Old Yeller back around and confronted the driver getting out of her car. Well, it was more like a rabid dog's barking than a verbal assault. I believe I conveyed the point that she almost killed me while making an illegal turn for fast food, but it's hard to say. After giving her a good verbal tongue thrashing, I heard her say, "I already said I was sorry".

Thankfully, it was only my anger that she had to be sorry about.


  1. That kind of makes this morning's adventure seem pretty lame.

  2. AHHHHHHH is the exactly correct thing to yell. Good work. I would have tried the brakes and surely crashed.

  3. I could use less of that kind of adventure in my life.

    The yell might have been what spared me. I was once told by my third grade teacher, Ms Hannebrink, that I had a big mouth. I'm not quite sure if that's what she meant, but it was quite an effective horn last Thursday.