Human Gazpacho

UNO Track Speed workout: 12 x 400m anaerobic threshold with 200m active recovery.

Regardless of whether you run or cycle, an ice bath really does help remove the lactic acid after a hard workout. Here's how you can do it in your own home:

Ingredients:
1 human
40 gallons of cold water
1 extra large (25 lb) bag of ice. Hy-Vee sells for $3.49.

1 Tbl Loose leaf Earl Grey Tea
1 warm jersey
1 Wool hat
1 copy of RunnersWorld

Marinate human meat in lactic acid for at least one hour before hand by pushing your V02 max at the track or on your time trial bike.
Prepare 8 oz cup with 190-200º F water. Add tea leaves to cup and steep 2-4 minutes.
Fill tub with cold water.
Put on wool hat and jersey.
Gently and *slowly* submerge lower torso into the tub.
Add 20 lbs ice.
Read RunnersWorld and drink hot tea.
Steep 20 minutes.