Friday, May 22, 2015

Panda Poop

This past week, I read this story about how scientists have concluded that giant pandas are eating their way to extinction because their digestive system is poorly suited for their favorite food, bamboo:

Despite spending up to 14 hours per day munching about 12.5 kg (27.5 lbs) of the plants’ stems and leaves, the animals can only digest about 17% of what they consume
As a result, Pandas must eat -- and poop -- all day in order to get the nutrition they require.

Pandas are a colossal failure.

Are humans much different? Perhaps we see something of ourselves in them. Maybe this is why we adore them so much.

For example, how nutritionally valuable was your last meal? Chances are likely that your gut's bacteria is not well-matched to many of your favorite foods.

The same can be said about what we put in our brains. In my opinion, 99% of what Hollywood produces is total garbage. And the big networks, the Netflixes and Hulus and the like, aren't any better. I stopped watching nearly every serial I had started on Netflix because I didn't want that puke rotting my brain.

But the worst of all goes to the sitcoms from the Big-3 networks. No, even worse than the sitcoms are the network newsy programs, like Good Morning America. Oh poop (I feel one coming on merely mentioning it). Indeed, I have absolutely no tolerance for info-tainment and melodramatic news.

I forgot, there's even worse: the threat of severe and unusual weather, and the resulting social media frenzy spilling over onto social media.

That last part -- the big brouhaha on social media -- is the human brain's equivalent to the giant panda pooping worthless pulp. Garbage in, garbage out. All day long.

That's why you need this blog.

And by you, I don't necessarily mean you, my reader. Unless, of course, you are me, rereading this post to justify its weekly installment. Then yes, Brady, this is why you need this blog. You need this because it is your unique voice. It's all yours, originating from within your creative imagination, and as told by you.  

Producing a blogpost each week is surprisingly not easy. In fact, it's often a chore (read between the lines -- like this time). But the effort is worthwhile in the end. At least I tend to think so.

Then again, it could be more panda poop. It's just my poop. Everybody likes their own brand :).

By the way, I have a theory on why the panda eats and poops so much bamboo, but I'll have to share that another time. If you're lucky, maybe that will be next week, when I'm staring at another unwritten blog post with a looming deadline.

Thanks for reading. Happy Friday.

Photo: Mei Xiang (Photo by Ann Batdorf), SmithsonianScienceNews

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